Saturday, December 09, 2006

Only in UniversityTown...

...would this be a normal occurance.

I was walking from my house to meet TheHippie at the discount department store downtown. We wanted to look at discount department store winter boots. I knew they would be cheap and that every coked-out baby-momma in town would be sporting the same pair, but I didn't care. I'm a townie now.

Anyway, as I turned off my street to walk down the busy downtown street, I witnessed the following at the intersection:

1. A homeless person dressed as santa, ranting incoherently at the passer-bys and scaring the children.
2. A midget (it might have been a dwarf. It was wearing a long coat) darting across the street.
3. The one-armed cripple zooming down the sidewalk on his scooter, orange flags flowing in the wind majestically.

Drunk hobo Santa, a scurrying midget, and the one-armed cripple all at once!!? It's everything I wanted for Christmas!! I WAS good!!

Thank you, Santa. And thank you, Universitytown.



TheHubby said...

Ahh...everyday in UniversityTown is a miracle...

This one time, in fourth year, I returned home from Thanksgiving to find that someone had thrown a rock into my bedroom window of my SUPER-Ghetto house...and I looked outside, through the shards of broken glass, hating my dirrty ghetto existence, and I saw a fat ghetto squirrel figthing a pigeon for a scrap of food. Moral of the story...God always gives us a little bit of happiness before he resumes kicking us in the junk :P

asian cymbals said...

UniversityTown - truly home of the shameless weird homeless.

I have a friend who came out of Shoppers Drug Mart on Valentine's Day one year. A bag lady wearing many dirty layers danced up to him and sang in his face: "I love you! Boop boop a doop!"

But hobo Santa, midget, and armless cripple all at once...Jesus, it's like The Crysalids, and UniversityTown is where all the Blasphemies have set up camp.