Wednesday, March 28, 2007

TheBoss Gets In Touch With His Feminine Side

Earlier this afternoon TheBoss came down to my office to discuss a project we were working on together. And by "together" I mean "I do all the work while TheBoss downloads pictures of monkeys who drink their own urine, and then calls me to tell me about them, and then gets all the credit for the work. "

Two other girls from my office were here, and TheBoss eagerly sat down and started gossiping about people that he doesn't like. I guess he assumes that this is what females do when gathered in groups? He, of course, assumes correctly. We are a gender of whores.

TheBoss got really excited, and relayed gossip with wide, un-blinking eyes, plenty of slaps to the thigh (his, for once), and exclamations such as "OH MY GOD" and "YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!" Then, realizing that he was 20 minutes late for a meeting, TheBoss darted out the door. But, before he left, he poked his wee head back through the office doors and exclaimed:

TheBoss: Oh my god, you girls are horrible!! If I were a woman we would totally all get our periods at the same time!!!

Pleasant. Plus I'm pretty sure that, if TheBoss were a woman, we wouldn't get all menstrually synchronized. The girls from my office and I would get bitchy and eat fudge, and TheBoss would complain of cramps, stagger to the washroom, and then find his palm pilot in his underwear ("I'll never lose you again!")

Did this even make sense? I don't care. I want fudge.



Anonymous said...

Microwave Fudge
You will thank me for this.

4 cups icing sugar
1/2 cup cocoa powder
1/2 cup butter
1/4 cup milk

Butter a microwave-safe bowl. Add all ingredients. DO NOT STIR! Cook for 1 minute 45 seconds. Take out and stir until smooth. Mix in 1 tbsp vanilla and 1 cup chopped nuts (optional).

Spread out in pan and put in fridge for 30 minutes.


The Peach said...

...Jebus? Is that you?

I shall now build a temple in your honour.

Actually, I lie. I'm going to make fudge and lie on the futon in sweat pants. Possibly cry.

Thank you, Jebus. Thank you.

Thank you.

Anonymous said...

An additional note regarding the administration of the above-noted therapeutic chocolate: the original recipe says that you should spread it in a pan and put it in the fridge for half an hour. This is so it hardens up and you can cut it into neat squares.

But you don't have to! Particularly if you are having a my-uterus-hates-me, sweatpants wearing day. You can eat it with the same spoon you used to stir it and it will still be delicious. And effective. Just in case you are overly compliant when presented with official type instructions.


Billy said...

You don't have to have a uterus to try this recipe, do you??

Also, I misread Peachy's comment, and briefly thought she planned to lie in the fudge.... not that there's anything wrong with that..