Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Another Meeting with TheBoss

TheBoss rushed into my office about 5 minutes ago and asked me to stop whatever I was doing and listen to him carefully:

ThePeach:...ok. Listening. *places one ipod headphone into ear*
TheBoss: I need to you do some quick and important research for me RIGHT AWAY.
ThePeach: Sure.
TheBoss: I need you to find out how long lunch meat can be left out before it goes bad.
ThePeach:...I need more details than that.
TheBoss: Say someone left a lunch meat sandwich in their gym bag for a while...when is it not ok to eat it?
ThePeach: Define "a while."
TheBoss: I don't know, man!
ThePeach: I need to know how long the lunch meat sandwich was unrefrigerated.
TheBoss: Maybe two days.
ThePeach: And does this sandwich have mayo on it?
TheBoss: Ya.
ThePeach: Was the gym bag left in a cool place?
TheBoss: No.
ThePeach: Don't eat it, Boss.
TheBoss: ...
ThePeach: Don't eat it!
TheBoss: Ok, what if I already ate it?
ThePeach: Well, now this is in God's hands. Maybe have a glass of water.
TheBoss: I don't feel good.

I'm a known risk taker when it comes to expiration dates (for example, mouldy bread can still be eaten if you toast the bejesus out of it, mayonnaise can be kept forever as long as it is chilled, and eggs don't go bad - they grow into chicken), but even I would draw the line at that sandwich.

He might die.

ThePeach

5 comments:

asian cymbals said...

Oh my freaking god!! EWWWW!!!!

That's insane, and so gross. And so hilarious.

Tania said...

I've got food-freshness-fears... I'll sometimes throw things out BEFORE their expiry dates - just to be safe.

You're crazy...

Your boss is crazier...

TheLegend said...

So, if TheBoss dies of this poison sandwich, would you think it was a UniversityTown parting gift from god?

The Peach said...

God, Allah, Satan, Jebus, Cheesus...they're all on my side.

Anonymous said...

maybe that's why the Boss is not in today...it's almost noon and he's still nowhere to be seen.

OfficeMate