Wednesday, September 17, 2008

In a sexual way

I’m the smartest one in my class.

We had an assignment this weekend to write a descriptive piece about a setting or person. I chose to write about a cab ride home on the foggiest, most surreal night I had seen in a while. I carefully described the fog, the drive, and the frenchie cab driver in what I thought was a poignant vignette. I hoped it would impress my tough and talented professor.

I should mention that this professor also pulls up each of our assignments using powerpoint in class so that the entire class can see what everyone else has written. He then critiques the writing in front of all of us. This is a style of learning that makes me shit in my paisley lulu underwear.

So, I handed this in on Monday and, in preparation for the critique I’m expecting in class tomorrow, this afternoon I re-opened the file I had sent him to take one last look at my work. The story was all there, just as I had remembered it. Beautiful. Then I scrolled to the bottom and noticed that I had failed to erase the point form notes I left for myself during the writing process. There they were, about 6 lines below the end of my story.

SHIT!

SHIT!

SO, my prof is going to think I’m goddamn moron. And so will my entire class. But it gets worse. What did the note to myself say?

“Remember to end with fog in a sexual way.”

End with fog in a sexual way? Now I’m not only a moron, but a nymph. A nymph with a woody for fog. I’m the whore who prioritizes the sexualization of fog in my writing – so much so that I have to leave myself reminder notes for emphasis.

Can’t wait for class tomorrow.

In a sexual way.

ThePeach

3 comments:

Cleavage said...

This leaves me speechless in a warm fuzzy deep down sort of way. Good lord I hope I catch you online after your class tomorrow.

Anonymous said...

That is exactly the fun kind of mistake I usually make. Usually without the sexual part though, lucky for me.

Sonya said...

Hells yes that was a good show-and-tell.