Saturday, September 27, 2008


*I ate fish sticks for dinner. *

That almost counts as meat.

Also, last night TheCrazy was in town and we did many redbull/vodkas and ended up aggressively making out with each other on the dance floor of a swanky bar as her husband watched. As in, she tried to take my pants off in the bar. And boobies were touched. Why do I turn into a massive bull-dyke everytime I drink with her? What does this say about me? I need a penis, stat. Clarification: not as in, I need to grow a penis so that I can fuck girls. No. Not like that. I mean as in I require some hetero sex.

Drunk Peach is fun. But drunk Peach is dangerous. I need a Designated Conscience (DC) to be by my side at all times. Any takers? I might punch you in the ear if your suggestions include putting on my pants, putting down the drink, and not raping my friends; but there's like a 75% chance that I'll hump you. The choice is yours.

Do I hear some Indigo Girls in the background?


1 comment:

Sonya said...

Whoa, Katy Perry! My first mission was to curb your use of "gay" to denote "stupid"...and I see there's still a shitload more work in the PC department to be done. Why, why, when there's already so much school work????